Friday, July 22, 2011

6 Months!?! Seriously?

I cannot believe that Lil' Lady A was born SIX MONTHS ago! The past six months have easily been the most wonderful months of my life. I thought being married was great, but life is even better now. As long as I can remember, I have dreamed of being a mommy. A big part of that is probably because I grew up with such an amazing mom. When I was younger, I used to say I wanted six or seven kiddos. I don't necessarily feel that way anymore, but I do love being a mommy! I'm not saying it's all easy, and I'm sure harder days are ahead of me. But in a way I have never felt before, I feel fulfilled. I feel like I am doing what I was made to do.


I've loved every moment so far, even the difficult ones, and have tried to savor, savor, savor as much as I possibly can. The squishy, tiny newborn stage was so precious! We were seriously trying to figure out what we were doing as new parents, and a most of those first couple months passed in a bit of a blur. Soon though, we became more comfortable and actually started leaving the house more. Meanwhile Little Lady kept growing and started smiling those sweet smiles right at us.  The last month or so has been a blast! I love this phase! She is rolling over, sitting up, playing with toys, grabbing EVERYTHING, and laughing (perhaps the best sound in the world). We already think she's going to be a little social butterfly because she loves being around people and is easily distracted from eating and sleeping when others are around. She is such a delight!


In a mere six months I have learned all kinds of things. I've learned how to breastfeed. I've learned to distinguish between different cries. I've learned that parenting looks different for each family (and probably each child). I've learned more about baby poop than I ever dreamed possible. In fact I've learned to be unfazed by any and all bodily fluids.  I've learned tons about cloth diapers and wash routines. I've learned that it takes much longer to get out the door than it ever did before. I've learned to do all kinds of things one handed... including but not limited to cook, clean, put on make-up, brush my teeth, type, laundry, dishes and more. I've learned that watching my husband love our daughter makes me fall even more in love with him.


Of all that I've learned though, I feel the most important thing I've learned is a better understanding of the love of God. Though I know I can never fully comprehend how much He truly does love us, being a mommy helps. I am so in love with our little blessing, but she has done nothing to earn my love. She is simply here. She exists. I would do absolutely anything possible to make sure she is happy, healthy and thriving. I want what is best for her in all situations, but she doesn't DO anything to make me feel that way. If anything, life is more difficult now. I get less sleep, there is more work to do around the house, I don't get to read or pursue other hobbies as much as I once could, some days are difficult to even shower, diapers need changed constantly, and I regularly end up in direct contact with poo. I clearly no longer come first in my life, yet I could not be happier. I imagine God feels similarly about us, though I know that somehow His love is even deeper. We don't have to DO anything to earn His love. He just love us! We even hurt Him and definitely mess things up, creating difficulties, but He loves us unconditionally!
 

Thank-you Little Lady for bringing immeasurable joy into our lives and for continually teaching us, especially all that you teach us about the Lord. Happy Half Birthday!

Thursday, July 21, 2011

Two to Three

Early on in our relationship, Matt and I discussed kids and were glad to find out that we both very much wanted to be parents. So, after about a year of marriage, we decided to not prevent anything. If I got pregnant, so be it. We were both into or approaching our 30's after all. I'm glad we started trying when we did, because it did take about a year and a teensy bit of medical help for us to get pregnant.

Of course we didn't realize it, but God's timing was great (imagine that)! A mere few week before we found out we were pregnant, we found out we were moving to Arkansas, which would allow me to fulfill my dream of staying home with our babies. It would have been MUCH more difficult to afford that living in Miami. When we found out we were pregnant, we could not have been more excited! The first day we saw that faint pink line on a pregnancy test, I was nervous that it was too good to be true, but even then I couldn't help myself from telling people. The next day the line was even darker, and we knew this must be for real!

I actually loved being pregnant. Of course there were inconveniences, but I was daily overwhelmed by the miracle taking place in my body. As our little "Sprout" started to grow, we moved to Arkansas. I didn't even look for a job because I knew as soon as Sprout was born, I wanted to stay home. I did some volunteer work and in hindsight could have started more hobbies or something, but I did have quite a bit more time on my hands, which allowed me to do lots of reading and research for our upcoming childbirth and preparations for a baby.

During this process, a friend recommended the film, "The Business of Being Born", and most of what I was thinking and planning completely and totally changed. I felt like blinders were taken off my eyes, and I decided I wanted a natural childbirth if at all possible.  I know that sometimes c-sections are life saving (I nor my mom would be here if it wasn't for c-sections), and I in no way judge anyone who had been induced or gotten an epidural. Sometimes that is the best choice, and I completely understand that. But based on my research and personal background, I felt that if it was at all possible, I wanted to have a natural delivery. Matt got on board, and we enrolled in Bradley Method childbirth classes. The training we received in these classes gave us the necessary preparedness to make it through labor and childbirth without medical interventions.

Before we knew it, it was January and the birth of our baby girl was quickly approaching, and my "white-coat syndrome" was acting up like crazy. I have irrational issues with doctors that causes my blood pressure to get too high. Doctors do not like this when you are pregnant. Several times I had to be monitored for several hours before being released to go home, and then one day I was showing multiple signs of pre-eclampsia. Therefore, I was admitted and told I was being induced. Knowing that pre-eclampsia is potentially very dangerous, we felt this was the best decision. We called all our family and settled in for the night. After a dose of cytotec and overnight monitoring, everything cleared up and the doctor (rudely) told us we could either start pitocin and proceed  with induction or go home. Though all our family was in town, we felt the best (though extremely difficult) decision was to go home and avoid an unnecessary induction.

Everyone except my mom had to leave before our little lady arrived, which broke my heart, but I still feel it was the right decision for us. I had contractions off and on for a week, and I went to bed on my 30th birthday and now past my due date wondering if she was ever going to come out. That very night though I started waking up throughout the night with contractions that felt different than anything had so far, but I kept trying to relax as much as possible and sleep in between them. As the next day (Friday) wore on, contractions continued getting stronger and closer together. After they had been about 3 min apart and lasting 60-90 sec, we decided to go to the hospital. Once we arrived, we were a little disappointed because I was only 1+ cm dilated, but the doctor in the ER thought that once I started dilating, I would progress quickly. She recommended we stay another hour and see what happened.

During that time, we did a lot of walking. My water ended up breaking, contractions were still strong and regular, and we were admitted. After several more hours of labor that was getting rather intense, I was checked and still had not made much progress. It was difficult to not be discouraged, but things suddenly changed.

Within an hour, I started feeling like I needed to push. The nurse came and said I was very nearly fully dilated and could start trying to push if I wanted. I pushed through a few contractions, and it actually felt good to be pushing. Soon the doctor came in though, and she was worried that baby girl was still a bit too high. Her concern was that if I continued to push it could cause me to swell, which would make pushing her out much more difficult. So, she asked me to try to NOT push for as long as I could. That period of time was the absolute hardest time of all of labor. I had no idea that could be so difficult, but we made it through. Matt was absolutely AMAZING through everything. I don't know how I would have made it with out him. I'm sure I would have been begging for drugs without such a great coach.

Anyway, when I couldn't take it any longer, we called the nurse back in, she said I was completely dilated and the baby had moved down quite a bit... so I started pushing and continued to push for almost 3 1/2 hours, which was exhausting but well worth it when she finally came out... "sunny side up" at 2:33 a.m on January 22. Seeing that little person who had been inside me for so long, was indescribable. I was immediately smitten and learned a whole new love I never knew I had.

When Lil' Lady A first arrived, I only got to touch her a moment because there was meconium in her mouth and the cord was around her neck twice so she was quite blue. The pediatrician was initially very concerned and took her away, but brought her back as quickly as they felt comfortable. They were all quite impressed with how quickly she transitioned, turned very pink and perked up. Since then she has been the picture of a healthy baby and has brought immeasurable joy into our lives.

I'm often asked if I'll go the natural route again... if at all possible, I absolutely will. It is the most difficult thing I have physically ever done but also the most amazing.

First family photo

Nana was there for it all too

Saturday, July 16, 2011

One Becoming Two (Part 2)

I cannot possibly tell "our story" without telling about the most wonderful, romantic proposal I could imagine...

Matt and I knew we wanted to get married, and we also knew that it had to be in the summer, or it would mean another entire year of driving back and forth and lots more goodbyes. We knew we did not want that, so we were most likely going to marry in the summer. Knowing that I was going to be planning a wedding while teaching full-time, I was getting a tad impatient when Christmas, New Year's and my birthday passed with no ring. I should have trusted my love though, because he had a wonderful plan!

January 24, 2008 was the day we were engaged, and oh what a day it was! My friend Alicia had made plans with me to go out for coffee then dinner to "celebrate my recent birthday." After I finished teaching that day, she came and picked me up, and we went to Starbucks. As soon as we sat down with our coffees, she reached into her purse, saying that she got me something for my birthday. She handed me an envelope with a "1" on the front. At this point, I was thoroughly confused. After all, I wasn't turning 1, 21 or even 31, but as soon as I opened the small wax-sealed envelope, I saw the handwriting of the one I love. I started crying immediately, because I was sure I was going to be getting engaged. The letter went on to explain that he was going to send me on a scavenger hunt of sorts, leading me to places and people that represented each of our seven months of dating. Alicia would be driving me around, since he knew I would be rather worked up.

The first letter told me to go back to my place, which is where our second month of dating began since our entire first month, one of us was traveling the entire time. After we started dating, I got a roommate, and she was there to give me the second letter, which told me to go to the place where we most often hung out with my friends in Sarasota... a little place called the Cock n' Bull.

Matt said it was during the third month he felt like he started go get to know my friends, specifically some guys who were in the band "Burden of a Day" along with their respective wives and girlfriends. Since the band was on tour, one of their wives was waiting for me with the third letter, telling me to go to the place he first swam with my cousins... Scott and Charla's house.

During our fourth month, he said that he began to realize just how important family is to me. He had already met my brother and parents, and he was also able to get to know my family living in Sarasota. When I got to Scott and Charla's, my aunt, uncle and all my cousins who live in Sarasota were there. Some people involved were running late due to traffic (I didn't know that at the time), and Charla had to make me stay until she got word from Matt. I loved that they were all able to share in my joy, but I was rather antsy. Finally, I was handed letter number four giving me the go ahead to continue my adventure to the place we had a special picnic one weekend... Marina Jack's.

The entire time we dated, only one weekend we did not see each other. Every other weekend, one of us drove to see the other including a weekend that Matt was quite sick. We were so in love that he drove to visit me despite his illness. I tried my best to take good care of him and nurse him back to health. By Sunday, he was wanting some fresh air and the weather was lovely. So we decided to have a picnic at the marina. When I came upon that same spot the night of our engagement, I was shocked to see five of his friends from Miami sitting on a bench with my fifth letter. I could not believe they had taken the time and made the effort to drive all that way on a Thursday to be there for us. They have all become dear friends of mine now as well. The fifth letter told me to go to the place we always go to when my family is in town... The Old Salty Dog.

It was in our sixth month that Matt got the grand opportunity to go home with me to Southern Indiana. I was extremely glad to see the ease at which he fit into my family. He has learned how very close I am with my family and how much they mean to me, especially my mama. Therefore, he made sure to include her in this momentous occasion. I nearly lost it when I ran into the Salty Dog and saw my mom sitting at a table! Matt had her fly down that day, and I had NO idea! All I could scream when I saw her was, "Mom! I'm getting engaged! I'm getting engaged!" She laughed and let me know that she knew already.  That was, in fact, why she was here. Thankfully, she had warned the staff that a very excited girl would be coming. In hindsight, I probably made quite a fool of myself, but I was already ecstatic and could hardly handle seeing my mom and knowing she would be around for this. My mom handed me my sixth and final letter, which instructed me to to the spot where we watched a nighttime electrical storm... the beach.

That particular storm and our conversation that night was a pivotal point in our relationship. Matt says that was the night he knew he wanted to marry me. I thought it might take us forever to get to the beach, but we finally arrived! I saw my love way out on the beach, but I didn't want to look like a completely crazy person and was trying to compose myself by walking. I couldn't take it any longer though and ran to meet him. He was waiting for me on a blanket complete with roses and champagne. When I reached him, he gave me a hug, then got down on one knee, proclaimed his love for me and asked me to be his wife. Of course I said YES!

We had a moment alone together, then we walked back up the beach to be joined by everyone who had been at each of my stops along the way. Treats and drinks were brought for all to share and celebrate. Apparently it was freezing on the beach that night. I didn't notice though. We spent some time celebrating with everyone, but Matt had made reservations for us at a lovely spot on St. Armand's.  I have no idea what we ate that night, but I know it was wonderful! Not only did he plan all that, he contacted my school to plan for me to be off work the next day, AND he scheduled a manicure for me because he knew my hand would be drawing some attention. I got me one amazing fella!

The night of our engagement
We went right to work that weekend planning our wedding. Since my mom was in town, she was able to help with a lot, and she was there with me when I bought my dress. Details seamlessly fell into place, and we were set to wed on June 29, 2008. The next few months were filled with wedding planning, showers in Texas and Indiana, finishing up the school year and looking for places to live. Time passed quickly and before I knew it, our wedding was upon us.

The entire wedding weekend was lovely. We were so grateful to share the day with so many we love. It really has been one of the best days of my life, and to top it off we left everyone for a fairytale night in the vice-presidential suite at the Ritz (we got an unexpected upgrade when we arrived) and a honeymoon in GREECE! My prince also planned every detail of that trip. I didn't even know where we were going until we were at the ticket counter in the airport. We had an unforgettable time in Athens, Santorini, and Mykonos.
Our wedding

Honeymoon in the Greek Isles
We have had three amazing years of marriage since then. Honestly, it's been better than I could have ever imagined. I have learned enormous amounts about the way Jesus love his bride by being loved by my husband. We've traveled to Texas, Indiana, Georgia, the Keys, Dry Tortugas, Chicago, Tennessee and the Bahamas. We have witnessed several more friends get married. Gone through job changes together, including one that moved us across the country to Fayetteville, Arkansas. And most recently we have embarked on the adventure of parenthood. We are the proud parents of our darling Lil' Lady A (I'll be writing lots more about her), and I look forward to many more years and adventures at the side of the most wonderful man I know.

Thursday, July 14, 2011

One Becoming Two (Part 1)

It's difficult for me to believe that just over four years ago I had not even met my prince charming. I was living alone in Sarasota, FL. While I was happy with my life, I knew I needed a change. Little did I know how amazing the change would be. Here's "our story" from my perspective...

It all started when I had quite a few people, within one week, ask me questions such as, "Have you ever tried eHarmony?" "Would you ever consider online dating?" "Have you ever thought about any of those dating websites?" etc.  My sister threatened to make an eHarmony profile, not realizing how extensive that undertaking could be, and my mom offered to help me pay the fee if I would be willing to give it a try. So, one night I was sitting home alone, twiddling my thumbs and had nothing better to do but spend a few hours filling out the massive questionnaire required to join eHarmony... one of my best decisions ever.

If you don't know how eHarmony works, they send you "matches" (men, in my case, with whom they think you will be compatible). Boy howdy were they right! Matt was in the very first round of matches sent to me, and our communication was easy from the start. We went from answering simple questions to sending one another LENGTHY e-mails sharing our passions, hobbies, joys, sorrows and the stories of our lives.

Within a few days, I knew this was a man I would like to meet in person, but I was living in Sarasota and he in Miami. Therefore, actually meeting face to face would require quite a commitment, but coincidentally (or as God had orchestrated) the AP conference I had to attend for work was moved from Orlando to Ft. Lauderdale. We happily made plans to meet during the week I was there, but Matt had a change of plans on the Sunday I was arriving, called me and we planned to meet that very evening in the hotel bar... I wasn't going to get in a car with a strange man I met on-line, gasp. As I got ready to go meet Matt, I was a bundle of excitement and nerves. My motherly roommate for the conference made sure I had her number programmed into my phone and even offered to come down with me and nonchalantly sit nearby to make sure everything was ok. I went down alone like a big girl though, and we had a wonderful time! We sat for hours and talked about anything and everything including theology and politics. After that evening, we planned to spend two more evenings together. Wednesday night I was a little more brave and we ventured to a restaurant across the street (Macaroni Grill) and walked around Barnes & Noble. Thursday night we went on our best date of the week, to the riverfront, and we ended the evening and the week by talking late into the night sitting beside the hotel's rooftop pool. We made our relationship "official" and settled on the next time we would see each other, which would be a month later due to planned travel.

 Our very first photo together (don't mind Matt's creepy mustache)

The following several months were nothing short of magical. I could tell countless stories about Matt showing up with flowers, watching lightning storms on the beach, meeting one another's friends and families,  holidays together, and lots of long hours spent on the road driving back and forth between Sarasota and Miami, but I'll spare you those details. Suffice it to say, we fell head over heels in love with each other and knew we wanted to spend the rest of our lives together...

Saturday, July 9, 2011

To Blog or Not to Blog?

After asking myself that hundreds of times, I have finally taken the plunge and start a blog.  This is something I’ve thought about doing for a long time, I just haven’t. I don’t know if anyone cares much about what I have to say, but I guess if you don’t care, you don’t have to read. I also wavered between Tumblr or Blogger? Tumblr or Blogger? Tumblr or Blogger? I nearly drove myself crazy with the asking of that question, but after playing around on Tumblr for a bit, I've decided on this avenue for now. We’ll see how consistent I will be, but it’s worth a shot.

“life with a lady” will be a lot about everyday life with OUR little lady and our parenting adventures. I’ve also been inspired by Lil’ Lady A to start crafting more… mostly headbands/hair pieces. Although, I’m hoping to start sewing as well. My wonderful mother-in-law has given me a sewing machine to use for me to make sure I do in fact like to sew.  I also hope to post about our cooking/baking creations, but I’ve been on a bit of a hiatus the last few months. I’m sure I’ll end up writing about other things as well such as books I read, music I love, movies we watch, etc.

As I get ready to hit the “Publish Post” button, I must admit I’m a little nervous… my writing, a part of me, will be out there now. I feel a bit vulnerable, but I’m doing it anyway! I hope this is an experience we all enjoy.